FEB 19, 2009 - THE UNIVERSITY REVIEW
Last Friday, February 13th, I had my official university review with Vernon Heperi, Dean of Students at BYU. Susan flew with me to Utah for the review, and a Valentine's weekend ski get-away. She has no religious upbringing whatsoever, and for her to witness the university review at a Mormon-run school was indeed shocking. She still can't believe what she experienced, and neither can I. She told me that several times during the review, she had to hold her mouth from dropping from the questions that Mr. Heperi asked me.
My experience as a full-blooded Latter-day Saint is that the LDS church has an obsession with sex- even more than my innocent beefcake calendar. They don't get off by openly acting out sexually, just by asking others what they do in private. They love to ask the dirty little personal questions. For those who are, or have been LDS- you know exactly what I am talking about. You never can enjoy a private moment without thinking that you will have to discuss every graphic detail in your next bishop's interview.
Well let's just say that my "university review" at the accredited Brigham Young University felt much like a bishop's interview - but it managed to entirely cross the line into much more personal, private questions.
From Heperi's point of view, in order for him to grant me an exception to receive a diploma because I was excommunicated from the Mormon Church, he had to determine that I was still in good honor code standing currently- meaning that since I was last enrolled at BYU in 2002, and bound by the honor code - up until the current time I sat across from him in the review, I had to have lived the BYU honor code in its fullest.
Yes, you read that right. The past 6+ years, even though I was not a student and had not stepped foot on campus until my August 2008 graduation, I had to have abstained from coffee, tea, alcohol, and anything and everything SEX all those years I was away in order to be in good honor code standing to receive my degree.
I am sorry to say that I have worn shorts, grew out a beard and watched an R rated movie a few times since 2002, so I might be out of a diploma.
If you think this is ludicrous, how do you think my poor friend Susan felt. She is still freaked out about it. My Dad was there too. Imagine being grilled about sex in front of your Dad- and at an "academic" review. I know I am a grown adult, but please! It was so extremely embarrassing and inappropriate. My family is uber-Mormon. They don't talk about sex, period! The whole experience was so surreal and strange and just plain degrading.
I recorded the review, and will have it available for public consumption in the future.
_________________________________________________________________________________
FEB 12, 2009 - YOUR EDUCATION IS IN THE HANDS OF A CAR MECHANIC
When you sign up for BYU, you must maintain an ecclesiastical endorsement at all times to remain a student, and obviously receive a degree. The frightening reality is that the entire time you are paying for, and attending a LDS Church owned university, your local church leaders at any time, for any reason, can call action against you, removing your ecclesiastical endorsement. This is what happened to me. A nobody from Las Vegas decided I was not worthy enough to be in the church because of my calendar project. He alone was able to remove my green light status to receive my diploma. BYU did not have to question him, nor was I given any formal hearing to present the case of what really happened before they made their decision. They used the "excommunication" as enough evidence to satisfy revoking my degree - no questions asked, no further investigation and exploration needed.
Scary.
I received this email the other day from someone who had been in a similar situation:
"While in law school at BYU, having been completely inactive for the previous 10 years in California and inspired by a mormon girlfriend, I decided to return to the church. Advising my bishop from American Fork that I had a real interest in returning to the church I was referred to a stake president who decided that a church court was needed. Suddenly my entire law school career was in the hands of a mechanic from Pleasanton."
How can an accredited university be allowed to behave in such a way?
_________________________________________________________________________________
FEB 8, 2009 - GEARING UP FOR BYU
After spending over $5,000 in legal fees, I have what I should have been offered in the first place - a university review with the dean of students at Brigham Young University, where the dean will determine whether or not an exception should be made for the school to give me my degree because I was excommunicated just a few short weeks before I was to be awarded it. The review is scheduled for Friday, Feb 13. Do I think BYU will give me the degree? No. The LDS church never says "sorry". Apologies are a sign of weakness. When you are perfect, you never have to apologize - and as I have always been taught, the church is perfect.
My attorney has asked again for the LDS church to specifically state why I was excommunicated so I can prove to BYU that I was excommunicated for something that is not in violation of their (dis)Honor Code. BYU even ran a story - twice - in the Daily Universe about the calendar. (Thank you BYU for the free publicity directed at my target audience. We sold A LOT of calendars to Provo, Utah that day.) The church has already stated that out of respect to me, they will not divulge publicly or in writing what went on in the council meeting on July 13, even though I am the one who is asking for the clarification. "Conduct unbecoming" could mean anything from a thief to a rapist. I want to clear my name and prove to the "don't ask, never question" Mormons that yes, my speech and personal expression was censored by the church - and that is why I was excommunicated - not because of some grievous sin. End of story. It's disgusting that the church knowingly and willingly is letting people assume the worst about me - in doing so, baring false witness. All the time I get e-mails from people saying that I was the topic of Sunday School, and the common consensus is that I am lying, that I am telling the media a one-sided story - that the church would NEVER excommunicate someone over a silly calendar. Even if I wanted to come back to the church, how could I now? I would wear the scarlet letter the rest of my life. Even worse, I would have to lie and say that the calendar was not the issue at hand for my excommunication. How could I live with myself? I am done lying - I did enough of that sitting across from my bishop during my personal interviews growing up.
It's so sad - my Dad refuses to believe that the church would knowingly hurt someone - nor will he defend his own son in this situation. He has told me to forgive BYU and get back in the church. He enjoys life wearing rose colored glasses, and refuses to even question why BYU just recently fired him from his part-time teaching job.
I know there are many people who find happiness, comfort and peace with the LDS faith. I used to be that person. However, I made the choice to go on a journey. I have no regrets for what has happened, and I am willing to take on what is to come and to hold BYU and the LDS Church accountable. After all, they have always held me accountable, and I always obeyed. This has been the most incredible journey - My eyes and heart have been opened and the endless possibilities of my life's purpose have been revealed to me. I was excommunicated from the church... and it saved my life.
_________________________________________________________________________________
JAN 12, 2009 - THOUGHTS ON THE NEW YEAR
It's already 2009. Wow. To change things up from my bitter last post, I am focusing on the good things coming this year. I am very optimistic about 2009, even though most are in fear of the lingering doom and gloom. I believe that all is fine in 2009, and after everything that has happened this past year - what is the worst thing that can happen to me? I still have my mind, my talents and my ambition. The church can't take those away from me, in many ways, they gave them back.
I am excited about the things on the horizon for 2009. We have two great calendars coming out this year, including Hot Mormon Muffins (can't wait) - and an exciting webisode, featuring our Muffins! I am trying to keep the BYU drama on the back of my mind and let my attorney do his job, and focus on the positive things of this year. I know everything will work out with BYU. It's sad they have chosen to take the path they are taking, but I believe the consequences of their choices will be monumental, and hopefully there will be a greater good that comes from it all.
I am working on a webisode series featuring yours truly called "Chad Hardy's Chunk to Hunk." I intend to get myself up to snuff with my models and appear in the 2011 calendar! (I am tired of telling people why I an not in it.) Well, the truth in the matter is I got FAT! With the enormous stress I have been under this past year, I have let the attention I was giving to my body go to make way for all the other things going on in my life. Here I am promoting beautiful people, and I am getting tubby! The Lexapro didn't help either - that stuff put 30 lbs on me in 2 months! I am now off the medication, mediating regularly and am doing a detox cleanse - The Master Cleanse. For those who are not familiar, it is the famous lemon, maple syrup and cayenne pepper cleanse. Wow! It's working wonders! I am on day 5 and I have lost 10 lbs of the Lexapro weight, and I feel great. Once I am done with the cleanse, I will start my workout and diet program. Wait till you meet my trainer! She is insane, and kind of naughty. I am documenting all of this with a video camera, and will be broadcasting it soon. Stay tuned!
I hope 2009 brings a lot of success and happiness to everyone. I truly believe if you do not buy into the fear, and focus on the things you desire, 2009 will be just fine! Keep it going on!
_________________________________________________________________________________
DEC 31, 2008 - YOUR TITHING DOLLARS AT WORK
As a kid growing up in the church, we were taught that 10% of our money belongs to the Lord – that all He asks in return for giving us the blessing of life, and the privilege of belonging to God’s only true and living church is to give Him 10% of our earnings. I can remember clearly the simple math lessons taught to us in Sunday School on how to calculate tithing payments, and was so excited to fill out my very own tithing slip to give to the bishop so I could be entitled to the blessings!
As I grew older and became more aware of the reality of economics, I began to question where all that tithing money went, how it was dispersed and how much the church was worth. The only answer I got is that the tithing went to build up the “Kingdom of God” and that most of the money goes back to the people by way of charity and other humanitarian efforts. Those answers were supposed to be enough to satisfy my curiosity.
It was obvious to me that the church had money and lots of it – and I was even very proud to know that I belonged to a very wealthy church, even though my parents struggled to put food on the table every day. My parents would use it as a lesson of faith to give to the Lord first, and in return we will be blessed and taken care of. In reality, we got free food from the church when times got tough – but that free food was only given because my parents were a full tithe payer, so in reality it wasn’t really free.
Nonetheless, the church keeps all of their financial records under heavy lock and key, and those who donate their 10% are not allowed to see where their money is being put to work. Why such a secret? Why are the church’s financial records considered so “sacred” (everything in the church that is secret is considered sacred) that their members who pay into it can not see where the money is being spent?
Through my adventures into the world of shaking up the status quo and tearing up the image sleeve that people hide behind in religious culture, I have been exposed to much of the underbelly of the goliath known as the LDS Church and how they operate when you are deemed as disposable and financially invaluable. Because of the media exposure I have received, I have had the opportunity to meet all kinds of people that have come out of the woodwork to talk to me about their experience in the church. The stories I have heard are quite remarkable and fascinating. One conversation in particular satisfied a thirst I have had for many years - and that's how much the church is worth, and do the higher ups have a financial investment in “building up the Kingdom”?
I received an email from a couple from out of state that were coming to Las Vegas on vacation and wanted to meet me and take me out for a meal. I agreed to meet them. As I listened to their exit story from the church, the woman began to share her brother’s exit story which had me on the edge of my seat. He had been employed by the church 15 years ago and was commissioned on a project to build software to collect the tithing money every Monday from the wards back when the Church incorporated and took over all the finances from the individual wards. According to her brother, 15 years ago when he built this software, the church brought in over 6 billion dollars annually in tithing alone. You can only imagine what that number is now. This man not only saw the money coming in, but he also saw it going out. From what he saw, less than 10% of the money the church brought in went back to charitable efforts. I was told about these “dummy” corporations that the church has set up that enables people to get paid for doing the “Lord’s work". He saw the checks and the excessive amounts of what the hierarchy in the church was getting paid, and the social network of old missionary companions and family members who were also on payroll. He no longer in good conscience could be a part of the organization, so he left the church and left his job. I asked this woman why he has not gone public with this information, and she told me because he does not want to cause trouble and go through the pain of the church to silence him. (Yeah, I know the feeling.)
This information is neither here nor there, but it's worth considering. Ever wonder why BYU, AKA the "Lord's University" has a law school? Why on earth would a church need a law school? Even stranger is that I got a phone call from an author who wrote a book about the Mormon Corporate Empire after I was excommunicated to warn me that the church will do things to annoy me and make my life miserable. He told me he would rather have the meanest mob in Las Vegas after him than the LDS Church. He told me that they have a whole department of ex-CIA’s that are part of this “Strengthening the Members Committee” and that they can access my personal information – my finances, everything, and also told me to not be surprised if I get audited by the IRS.
So from what the information I could gather, the church pays people with tithing money to spy on people. That would explain how my Stake President got my work email and work phone number, when it is not listed anywhere with my name on it in any public record that I know of. If rescinding my BYU diploma is any indication of what they are capable of, watch out! I did ask this guy why he still belongs to the church if he knows all of this- and his answer? "Because the church is true."
Anyway, bottom line is I really don’t care if people in the church get paid – we all have to eat. Just be upfront about it. I don’t care that the Mormon Church is uber-wealthy – just be upfront about where you are spending your money and don’t use your power that comes from your tithing money on unethical practices and campaigns against people who think, live and believe differently than you.
I have already seen a small glimpse of the power the church has because of their tithing dollars. Look how powerful the church was with passing Prop 8 because of their ability to raise a ton of money from their members. You do realize that if Thomas S. Monson asked members to donate to the No on 8 fund, they would have done it without question.
The church tithing dollars has already been put to work in employing people to research every legal loop hole at BYU to take away my degree after I graduated, and is employing Michael Orme to respond to the letters from my attorney telling me that their ambiguous “Honor Code” actually has a leg to stand on in my situation without giving any facts of the matter. All of this is only racking up unnecessary legal fees on my end, which thankfully I have been able to raise from the public. Already, BYU has cost supporters over $3,000 in legal fees just to get to this point where it looks like we will have to file a lawsuit. Then how much is this going to cost with their never ending legal pleadings and never ending ambiguity? You can never get a straight answer from these people – it’s like they speak in biblical round robin nonsense. How much tithing dollars is the church going to have to spend to keep me from getting my rightfully earned diploma? Just think of the good we could have done with the legal fees and time wasted on both sides of this situation. Just think of the good that could have been done with all the Prop 8 money! Where is Jesus when you need him to sort out this sordid mess!
And now the church has retained an attorney by the name of Alan Sullivan at Snell & Wilmer to respond to our demand for the church to publically clarify why I was excommunicated to correct the harmful innuendoes they have created and have posted on their very own newsroom website. (I get emails weekly telling me I was the topic of Sunday School and Relief Society, and that the census is that I am not telling the truth and am guilty of something greater than the calendar.) Hey Monson, this needs to be cleared up! When you are done getting your shoes shined (read that article, thanks) can you hurry up on that revelation that you guys really f@#%ed up? Oh, and while you are at it, maybe you can start repairing the damage you caused with the Prop 8 fiasco. My family are all members of the church, and they are suffering backlash because of your decision there, Tommy.
Anyway, back to subject - the church paid Alan tithing dollars to write a letter to my attorney stating that the church will not release the reasons publically out of respect to me, even though I am the one asking them to state the truth because what they are doing is harming me. Obviously I am not the one that has anything to hide – and the fact that the church used tithing money from struggling families across the world to write me a baffling letter saying that I was have already been told the reasons for my excommunication in my disciplinary council (which never happened) and also in my letter following my excommunication (that only states reason as conduct unbecoming) is completely embarrassing. The church is using tithing dollars to cover up why they really kicked me out of their exclusive kingdom, rather than saving the time and money that this will cost both of us, not to mention having the integrity to say YES we excommunicated Mr. Hardy because we did not approve of his expression.
According to the article “Thou Shalt Not Bare False Witness” in the LDS magazine “Liahona” dated November 1998, it states that "lying and misrepresentation in all forms are wrong, no matter how they are rationalized, and those who silently let these evils pass unchallenged are also doing wrong. James explained, ‘Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin’ (James 4:17).” Perhaps because this was printed 10 years ago, it is out of date and no longer considered official doctrine, much like Brigham Young’s Journal of Discourses. Hey, I am just saying…
The LDS Church has lots of tithing money from around the world to cover up what really went on July 13 and meanwhile allowing the assumptions and innuendoes to run rampant through the Mormon community to assume I am guilty of a worse crime, therefore I must be a really bad person is shameful – even more shameful than my calendars expressing human beauty. I don’t have the endless bank account to fight this like the Church has to cover it up, but I do have my truth and integrity which is more powerful than any monetary value.
At the end of the day after all of this, I am still the bad guy because I dare hold “the Lord’s anointed” accountable. Of course, if they are right they are considered a prophet of God, but when they are wrong, they are just a man letting human weakness rear its ugly head. This is a two way street, and I am willing to walk the walk as long as I have the financial means to do so. Thank you to all of the support I have received from around the world. What I have set out to do with this fun little calendar project is manifesting everyday, so thank you to those who also get what I am doing.
Just as Alma states in the Book of Mormon “behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass; and small means in many instances doth confound the wise.”
It is my prayer that BYU and the LDS church will let go of their pride and spite and do the right thing and let us both move on with our lives to stop any further embarrassment. Digging their heals in deeper will only cause more harm to the educational validation of BYU and the so-called love that the LDS church has for people of diversity and free-thinkers.
DEC 17, 2008 - MEN AND A MISSION AND PROP 8
I am very sad that I have received several messages from members of the gay community in regards to distancing themselves from this project because of the Church's stand on gay rights. I personally do not support the church in their decision of their involvement in Prop 8 - I personally gave money to the No on 8 fund. It makes me sad that they did what they did, and equally as sad that individuals of the gay community are acting just as prejudice to Mormons in general because of this.
This project was intended to find common ground regardless of race, religion and lifestyle. For the gay community to blacklist this project is just as prejudice and intolerant as those who worked and voted to take away gay rights in California.
Men on a Mission is not affiliated with or endorsed by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. In fact, I was excommunicated for spearheading this project. I personally know what it feels like to be attacked by an organization for expressing who I am. Please do not put salt on the wound by turning your back on this project because of your knee-jerk reactions.
Those who boycott us are picking a fight with the very people who are here to be your friend and build bridges and mend the gaps and hurt. The project is intended to be fun and light-hearted. We have appeared in many gay publications around the world and support all our brothers and sisters regardless of what makes us different. We celebrate the diversity in our world.
If you want to continue to fight to separate yourself from others based on stereotype and gross generalization, then you are just as guilty as those who voted to take away your rights in November.
Not all Mormons hate gays. Not all Mormons want to pick a fight with the gay community. Please, judge individuals by their actions, not an entire group by their leaders' actions.
The hate needs to stop on both sides of the fence.
Peace.
CHAD HARDY
________________________________________________________________________________
NOV 13, 2008 - THE GOOD NEWS ABOUT PROP 8
Last weekend, I had the opportunity to hang out in front of the LA Mormon temple while protestors shared their expressions of the passing of Prop 8. It was a fascinating experience listening to their stories and their plans for nationwide protests. My Facebook e-mail is getting filled up with rallies and protests around the country. The news coverage about the backlash on the LDS church and others who supported Prop 8 is unbelievable and fascinating.
It has become apparent to me that the passing of Prop 8, in the long run, will return a greater reward and victory for the LGBT community around the country, and possibly around the world. Because Prop 8 passed, the LGBT community is coming together on a scale unimaginable. They are organizing as a unified force in cities around our country as one voice for equality for all. They are publicly speaking up in way that has never happened before, and in turn getting worldwide media attention. Though the road will be bumpy, and there is still so much unchartered territory yet to cross, what is happening now is the exact shaking of the status quo that needs to happen to educate the masses to create change for the good. In doing so, the human race can continue to evolve and improve. There is nothing "immoral" about two people of the same sex loving each other. What is immoral is not recognizing that love because of a learned tradition, and to make that love "dirty".
Like I have said before, my personal campaign that I am promoting is not intended to be a hate campaign against the LDS church. But like Prop 8, it is an opportunity to publicly allow the church to be accountable for their actions. I don't hate the church. I don't hate the Mormons. If I did, I would be a hypocrite. I love so many things about the Mormon faith and the happiness it can bring- there are many beautiful things about it, and there are so many beautiful things about all faiths. However, if a church is going to house faith for millions of people, then that house needs to be one of love, acceptance and tolerance for ALL people, for ALL humankind. Their rules need to be that of love, and not of intolerance. The abuse needs to stop, and the leaders of the LDS Church and all of Christian America needs to become educated on this issue. At one time, interracial marriage in the LDS Church was considered immoral, YES, IMMORAL! My dad's generation was taught that you can not cross the blood of God's people (the whites) and Cain's people (the blacks). No wonder my dad never wanted me hanging out with my black girl friends.
We should thank and show gratitude for the Mormon monetary contributions that funded and passed Prop 8 which has now created a global unity of the LGBT community that has proven to be the spring board and engine that will eventually protect the rights of millions of people in generations to come. This is not a matter of IF, it's a matter of WHEN. The momentum has begun, and I see it only becoming stronger as more people are open to love, open to light, and open to the silliness of things called Prop 8.
The religious can no longer hide behind their picture-perfect image and politician smiles while disrupting the lives of millions of individuals and families behind closed doors. The internet age is here, and information is available to anyone who wants to find truth. May God speed to bring continued love and light in the form of equality and justice to our deserving brothers and sisters.
________________________________________________________________________________
NOV 9, 2008 - The Men on a Mission photo shoot was featured on BBC 1 on the program "Stephen Fry in America" Check out the link here below:
STEPHEN FRY IN AMERICA EPISODE 5
________________________________________________________________________________
NOV 7, 2008 - As many of you know, I was recently denied my BA degree in Communications Studies at BYU after completing all the requirements for graduation because I was excommunicated from the LDS Church for publishing the infamous Men on a Mission Calendar. I have retained Stephen Clark with Jones Waldo, one of the best civil liberties attorneys in Utah, as well as George Frandsen, former president of the ACLU in Utah.
This fight will be very expensive as the LDS church will use its enormous financial power to discourage me from holding BYU and church officials accountable. I am asking all my friends and family to please help get the word out for the legal fund that has been established for this case. If you can not donate yourself, please forward this email to as many people as you know that has an interest in stopping this kind of abuse from going on within the walls of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. The only way to get the church to behave is to publically show how they really operate behind closed doors.
This is not intended to be a hate campaign against the LDS church. That has never been my intention. This is simply a campaign to allow the church to be accountable and to follow their procedures truthfully, honestly and with integrity. I am saddened by the actions of the LDS church against me, and against many of my family members in their own separate issues. This abuse needs to stop, and together we can make a difference for people in similar situations.
You can visit this website to get up to date information about the campaign, the legal team, and to contribute to the legal fund. Please pass the word on to everyone you know. I need to raise $10,000 in 30 days.
There will be an article on this campaign in next week’s issue of the Advocate, available at any bookstore newsstand, and there will likely be press coverage of future developments. Stay tuned!
xo,
CHAD